“Used to dream of outer space, but now they’re laughing at our face, // Saying, ‘wake up, you need to make money.'”
Lordy lord, I have been crazy stressed out this week. There’s just a lot I’ve been internalizing and a lot going on, and it hasn’t been any fun at all. Even with my attempts to not let it bother me, which has lead to feeling like I’m about to spontaneously explode, a delicate simmer of a nervous breakdown tingling right under my skin, I still had two break-downs at my place of employment, and that’s always fun. February is going to be a rough but interesting month for me, and I just have to survive it and then things will even out.
At least one of my stress factors is resolved, for the time being. This past year has been quite the adventure with my car, which seems to be progressively breaking down, one thing after the other, which, considering I’ve had this car for seven years, isn’t surprising, and the fact that I haven’t had any trouble with it so far is pretty impressive. But the battery died…completely dead, need-a-replacement dead, and I was pretty sure I wasn’t able to afford it with the new apartment expenses, but I crunched some numbers and had a minor heart attack and replaced it anyway, because giving it a charge and making sure to drive it every 12 hours (at least!) was a big pain in my rear and the uncertainty was driving me mad. So there’s at least that.
Now the biggest stress factor is the apartment and the super-duper tight budget we’ll be living by until things get settled. I know this place fell into our laps and if we didn’t take it, it would be gone, but, damn. Of course we wind up with two rents and all the fun costs of moving during the shortest month. At least it will pass, and I’ve almost got my taxes finished with a pretty nice refund and April is a blessed three-paycheck month, so I just have to keep looking forward and eyes on the prize, blah blah blah.
Actually being in the new place is going to help a lot, too. Just one more week! I can’t freaking wait.
L.S. Engler 